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The mystery of missing time

Time is a fickle thing- or so I have been told. In youth, time seemed to crawl by akin to an injured sloth dragging itself across a busy highway. In late adolescence, the same seemed to true, with perhaps the sloth being mended to a fully able amble. Sometime between graduating University and joining the 30s club did time shed its leisurely pace and trade it in for a jet pack expansion. Now, I feel like I blink my eyes twice and a week has vanished; three times and the entire month has disappeared leaving me with the simple, yet sincere question of “where did that time run off to and why didn’t it tell me it was leaving so soon?”.

I know I am not the only one that has reflected on this strange phenomenon…I have discussed it with friends before and we all agree that each increasing decade seems to boost the fast forward button into a higher gear. One friend has determined that this is due to the lack of new experiences we come in contact with as we age, another has said technology has changed the sense of time as each year humans are able to have more things on their schedule as the way of life gets easier with each coming invention. I believe both to be true, but still find myself blindly groping about for a pause button to slow down and breathe for a moment without watching the time tumble into the abyss. How can we have the slow moving mornings of times past when we have a to-do list the length of the Mississippi River waiting for us each time we open our little eyelids? How do we stay in touch with the people we love when we hardly have time enough to live a healthy lifestyle? If we spend 3 hours a day meditating to find peace of mind, how do we find the time to work on our projects, learn a new skill or catch up with old friends? If we allot our time to drinks with friends after work what new skills and experiences are we giving up practicing and perfecting?

These questions are nothing new, and perhaps that is what adulthood is— a game of time blocks; maneuvering each block of time to try to create your “best life”. I have found that this game is perhaps more akin to the higher rungs of Tetris. You plan and place each block of time neatly in a row but the blocks keep falling faster and in odder shapes making your placements become faultier as the rows grow higher. It becomes so hard to find the perfect line to get rid of a chunk of debris. Chaos ensues as the blocks keep piling up and blocking your intentions. Next thing you know, you are 100 and have completed a tenth of what you wanted to. I hate the thought of reaching “Game Over” with so many mismanaged blocks in my wake, but is there any alternative?

I suppose time management is directly correlated to creating a life vision, setting goals and intentions for your future actions and priorities. The problem is—I keep telling myself I simply do not have the time to sit and decide what these are. So time keeps jumping forward and I seem to continue to constantly blink it away in a refusal to find what it is that I find important in this life.

Now, don’t get me wrong— I have created a fun life thus far; I continue to have my fair share of adventures and new sights and seek new skills constantly but I have not dedicated the time needed to perfecting or progressing in pretty much any of them. The level of commitment I have dedicated to growing my art business has been timid at best. Instead, I find myself prioritizing pretty much anything else that comes up. Climbing trip or goal setting? You guessed it, I’m going out to climb. Planning and writing multiple blogs and having them set to release each Sunday in advance or painting—painting it is. Saying no to friends and staying in to reach out to companies about possible mural opportunities? Nobody wants to miss out on good times! Dedicate your time to yourself or give it freely to others? I’m always ready to hand it out to the first bidder.

As it seems that time is a very stubborn thing that refuses to slow its gallop I believe that I will have to improve where I allow and want it to disappear to. Do I want it to vanish into thin air without a care of when or why, or, do I want to take the time to divide it  out into purposeful parcels that build the type of life I ultimately want to leave behind?  Is the problem the speed of modern life or is the problem that I don’t say no and own the time that belongs to me, giving it out to any person that offers to take it? Is learning how to manage time effectively the most important skill for me to focus on in order to grow my budding business? These are the questions I am dedicating myself to this month. I believe that creating time intentions will be the key to creating more opportunities and perhaps slow the trot of time to something slightly more manageable. Or maybe that is just the dreamer in me, only time will tell..

Thank you for reading along with me this week as I try to decipher the logic of time. If you have any advice on the topic of time, I would love to hear it.

As always,

Keep it offbeat ( but on time )

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